OMG!

I've discovered The Awful Forums thanks to a post on Paul Phillips' blog. At $10 for a lifetime subscription, I would highly recommend it to anyone that likes to kill time online. Absolutely hysterical community somewhat akin to the likes of the Best Page in the Universe or Tucker Max.

Anyway, this story is unreal. I've copied and pasted it to a page on my site so you're not required to subscribe to the forums to read it.
It's located here.